got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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