It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
