No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Randomize
