haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
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