Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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