Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
