That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
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