everyone is single if you try hard enough
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize