you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
