i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize