FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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