omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
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