Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize