Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
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