forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
As shirtless as possible
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize