You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
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