YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
