nut hugger
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
