What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
Randomize