Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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