____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
