how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize