I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
