Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
