I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
He ran over from the bar to give me more singles because the stripper was doing gymnastics on me. He is a really great friend, just probably not the best boyfriend.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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