Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Vodka?
Forever.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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