I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
god, I love you
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.