i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
