sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
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Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
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i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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