The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Randomize
