i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Randomize