My room smells like vodka and shame
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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