We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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