NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize
