I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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