we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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