Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Randomize
