Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Come share oat with me in your robe
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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