U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
