Quick, to the slutcave!
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
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