Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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