remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Randomize