I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
if i died would you start the facebook group?
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
