Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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