He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Randomize
