Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize