You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
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