I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
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