worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
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