Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
she peed on how many people?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
